Writing your own vows might seem daunting, but it’ll be worth it when you’re exchanging rings!
Here are some tips to make the process easier.
How To Write Your Own Wedding Vows
1) If you practice a certain faith, read about traditional vows from your own religion to see what appeals to you. Incorporate these samples into the original words you write.
2) Decide how you want your vows to come across. Humorous? Poetic? Romantic?
Will you share them with each other or keep them a secret until the wedding day?
3) Jot down notes about your relationship. Here’s a handy list.
Why did you decide to get married?
What challenges do you envision in your future?
What do you want to accomplish together?
What makes your relationship tick?
What did you think when you first saw your fiancé?
What do you most respect about your partner?
How has your life gotten better since meeting your mate?
What about them inspires you?
What qualities do you most admire in one another?
4) Come up with some promises. They’re called vows for a reason, so the promises are the most important part. Include promises that are broad in scope, such as ‘I promise to always support you,’ as well as very specific ones.
And now is the time to write your first draft. Affirm your love, praise your partner, offer promises and close with a final vow.
Be authentic. You can borrow from poetry, books, religious and spiritual texts, even from romantic movies, but make sure the words are your own, not someone else’s. In other words, don’t rely on cliché phrases.
Remember to think about how your vows will sound to you ten years from now. Have a friend or family member read it over ahead of time for feedback.
Reverend Darrlyn Smith is an ordained minister with The Alliance of Divine Love, an interfaith ministry. She presides over wedding and commitment ceremonies, assisting you in personalizing your special ceremony. Call her at 561.722.9368.